I’ve known for a long time I suffer from depression. What didn’t get through my thick skull was the fact this isn’t something I can deal with myself, even with therapy. As much as I would like for things to be that simple, this latest episode has shown me I need something more.
Through therapy I have been given some new ways to work through mild episodes and they have worked to some degree, but there are times when it comes from someplace deeper, when I am sure it isn’t just a frame of mind but a chemical imbalance.
If I’m right, and from some of the things I have read I think I am, then I need to speak to our family doctor about medication. The thought of taking something bothers me, but if it can help, then I would be a fool to refuse to at least consider the possibility.
I will admit I am more than a little nervous when it comes to taking something designed to change the way my mind works. I worry abut it affecting my creativity. So much of my writing and art has been fueled by this negative energy I’m not sure what might happen if it isn’t there. Then again, maybe something even better will come out. Whatever the case, I need to have a sit down with a professional and have these questions answered.
I have worked too hard, come too far, towards finally getting my life back to let it slip through my fingers.