This is proving to be a busy week. I have a doctors appointment tomorrow, it’s mostly to have lab work done for my BP meds, but I am going to confront him regarding hormone therapy. Specifically I want to know why he decided to only have my T levels checked and not estrogen as well which is what I thought he was doing. I am also going to be taking him the information I have on standards of care. I seriously doubt he has bothered to do any research on his own and so I am going to have to do it for him or let him know I am going to have to search for a new provider to deal with my health issues beyond the basic things he is currently treating me for. As far as my BP and antidepressant are concerned, I’ll keep him simply because he is local and these are things I have to deal with on a monthly basis. Otherwise I am going to be forced to look to someone else in dealing with anything Trans related. It will be a major pain, but I don’t have a choice.
The other thing is I was contacted by my therapist Jodi today to set up an appointment for this Saturday. I am somewhat conflicted about this as she canceled my last appointment with the promise to get back to me “shortly”, that was three weeks ago. I’m really not sure if she even wants to continue to see me or not and even if she is, I’m not sure I want to see her… I mean what’s the point when I have to go five or six weeks between sessions? Two weeks is often bad enough. Well, I have some time to think about it and I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt until I talk to her face to face.
Speaking of hormone levels, I know if this goes forward then I am going to have to deal with weight issues. I want to continue getting into better shape, just for myself if nothing else. I have lost around 10 pounds or so in the last few months, but i would like to lose about 20 more. I have changed my diet and portion sizes, pretty much dropped any sweets and I am slowly increasing my activity levels to burn off the weight. One thing I probably should bring up with the doctor, (unless he totally blows me off), is getting a new workout program together, what I am doing now is working but I would like to increase how much I am losing each month. I know I’m not going to reach my goal before my next birthday, but maybe Labor day…
The main thing at this point is to keep moving forward. The mistake I made was to think I could simply coast along for awhile, not really making any decisions which would put me outside of my comfort zone. I just couldn’t admit there is no such thing any more.