Where Angel’s Fear…


This morning I made a decision, for good or ill, I cannot take back.

(Allright, reading that line back to myself sounds ominous…)

What did I do? Well, I had my annual evaluation at work. Not a big deal really but without really thinking about it I decided to come out to my boss and it went off without a hitch. 

She was very accommodating including giving me names of who I needed to speak to in HR. I mentioned not wearing makeup at work and she joked about some of the ladies who do, (on day shift) and how she couldn’t understand how they could clean showers and not have their makeup run off their faces. I also mentioned my fears about my coworkers and she assured me there shouldn’t be any issues and if there were I could come and talk to her.

Overall, a rather nice experience.

She did suggest I wait a little while before speaking to HR as this is the beginning of the semester and things are really hectic over there especially the first week. So, I have time to catch my breath, talk to my therapist, and figure out my new timeline.


8 thoughts on “Where Angel’s Fear…

  1. *
    Maybe times are different.

    I changed my name and sex at SSA (1978) but remained employed as male until 1985.

    I worked in personnel management for a major federal agency (1978 – 1985). I overheard my supervisor out me to another supervisor when my supervisor received that Social Security Administration’s ‘Discrepancy List’. I heard co-workers speak horrid rumours for two years.

    I was promoted to a new office of the same agency – at a different state. My second supervisor at that location did worse than my first – she called me to her office and told me she was taking action to fire me (1983): ‘We can’t have a female working here as a male’.

    I fought that termination action for two years of administrative procedure. Then I quit – it was not worth the fight when I otherwise decided I can move elsewhere and find another job. Besides, the consolation was victory at Un-employment Insurance – UI sustained my claim on the grounds of the intolerable working conditions.

    My biggest regret was that I failed to return to work the next day as Sharon / female. Then what could my boss have done? Fire me as a female working there as a female?

    One co-worker of my same agency who was stationed at the personnel office at Washington, DC, began her transition shortly before my exit and nothing bad happened to her. Hmm.

    Then again, there are still no laws protecting trans. We can be fired precisely because we are.

    1. Things are slowly changing, thankfully Illinois has nondiscrimination laws which protect me and my workplace recently in- acted their own policies as well which is why I felt I could say something to management.

  2. This is great! I’m so glad it went well. And I concur the recommendation to wait a couple weeks before going to HR I worked for schools for years, and the beginning of the semester is no time to take something that could be complicated (read: require a lot of paperwork) to any office.

  3. I’m happy for you. If you work for an employer with anti-discrimination policies including HR is a good idea. Good luck moving forward.

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