Where to from here?

I’m feeling lost. I’ve reached the point where not living as myself is becoming dangerously stressful yet looking at living full time poises some serious road blocks. The biggest being my legal documents are in my dead name and the wrong gender which makes getting work difficult at best. Also, it is looking as though medical transition isn’t an option due to cost which leaves me in limbo both physically and mentally.

I just don’t know if this is worth it anymore.

16 thoughts on “Where to from here?

  1. There are states where GCS coverage is mandatory under insurance. There are non-profit advocates who can often assist in getting legal documentation done. There are ways to get this done. It’s never easy for anyone, but for me, it was very very very much worth it.

    1. My insurance is through a catholic organization and so is my primary physician, so that’s a no go.
      I will look into getting legal assistance.

  2. exact same feelings at times. You will come out of this stronger than before, but boy, it sucks at the time. I’ve accepted due to cost and age I will never have the surgery. I’m okay with that. Something will turn up for you, I just know it

  3. Have you consulted any legal aid groups to help you navigate the paperwork and maybe lower any costs? If you can at least get your documentation in order, that might provide a needed boost and make things easier.

  4. Hey Kira, it’s been a long while since we’ve talked, but I’ve been watching and reading. I have dealt with a number of hardships and difficulties myself after beginning my transition as you know and I’m still going through them. However, there’s one thing I do know for sure: It’s worth it.

    However, despite me saying that, I know that your hardships are quite different. The most that I can offer you is comfort that you don’t have to wander alone aimlessly questioning.

    I’m not sure if you caught this news, but I decided to end Meganekko Memoirs and move on to synchronizing my full identity at a new blog connected to my professional website. I’ve graduated from writing in the shadows and I want to use my experiences & insights to offer those who similarly struggled as I did to figure this out. If you are interested: http://ninasumter.com/blog

    I hope you’ll stay in touch and not let the doubt of darkness keep you away. Much love. ~ Nina

    1. Thank you for your kind words and the link to your new blog, you have once again given me the comfort of knowing I am not alone and the happiness of knowinf you are doing well. I have bookmarked your blog and look forward to reading about your adventures 🙂

  5. Kira, you know and road is long and difficult but you also know there are many friends that support YOU (Kira) we love you and we are here to listen and support you. i wish i could give you a big hug i wish your whole family would give you all the support and help that you need. it is a long road but you have gotten this far keep moving to become the Kira you are and are meant to be. hugs of love & support

  6. I wish you had universal health care!
    Although possibly somewhat trying, we do have allowance for transgender transition through the public medical in Canada, Many other countries offer this. The US is behind on this issue. I can understand your frustration. Many hugs & much love – Resa

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