Sitting here I realize there are things about my mind I simply don’t understand.
I know at this point living life full time as myself isn’t an option I can turn on or off at a whim, it is a matter of life and death. Yet I have something deep inside which insists I could in fact continue living the lie which has broken me more than once, nearly killed me and has left me an emotional wreck. A lie which has stolen more from me than I could ever hope to understand let alone explain.
Why do I wake each day and tell myself I can survive a little longer without transitioning?