Okay, After today I have had enough.
I know the majority of my writing on this blog has been centered on being transgender and transitioning, however I have many other issues I have been dealing with at the same time and unfortunately they often get mixed in with and interfere with my ability to make decisions regarding what is best for me and the path I need to take to become someone I can live with.
These past few months have been especially difficult because my depression has become almost unbearable. It has gone from a constant backdrop to an ever growing mountain. At this point my life has ground to halt, even the smallest things often take most of my energy and I am left exhausted. Dealing with transitioning is out of the question, even thinking about who I am brings on anxiety and suicidal ideation. Nothing so strong I can’t push through it, but again, exhausting and failure is a very real fear.
I am going to make an appointment with our family doctor and see what he recommends.